Smart phones have revolutionized the way we court, romance and do relationships, but with the advent of the Internet these new sensational habits come with high risks.

As we marvel at celebrity sexting indiscretions, more frequently now the cause of a scandal, there has never quite been a more fashionable time to stay away from those naughty messages.  We just can’t help ourselves.

It’s even become a deal breaker in the dating world, much like the decision to have or not have sex.  The way you handle the burning question (to sext, or not to sext) can put out or illume your relationship.

The Nice Guy You Just Met

You may at one point or other meet a really cute guy that you can’t wait to get hot and steamy with.  There is nothing wrong with deciding to do a little harmless flirty via text messages, provided that you avoid obscene details and focus on the idea of sexy not the actual act.  Take caution, remember you just met this guy and you don’t know him at all.

The Boyfriend

There is much more to a relationship than a deep connection to someone.  Keeping a relationship heavy and healthy includes having a sex life.  When you’ve been apart for a long time it can often times put a strain on your relationship, but all you really need is a little love’n.  You have a technological advantage during these trying times, steamy photo messages.

Of course, they’re only an advantage if you trust he won’t upload to a photo-sharing site (or worse, Facebook) if things between the both of you took a turn for the worst.  It could be quiet the embarrassing situation and can seriously hurt your reputation like N.F.L player for the Jets, Brett Favre.  The text messages he exchanged with massage therapists, currently under investigation, almost cost him his contract.  To makes matters worse; these ladies are suing him.

If you must bare a little skin in attempt to satisfy his insatiable desires then keep it cute and light, lingerie and cute PJs.  Don’t be too graphic, it can be disturbing and leaves nothing to the imagination.

Remember, even when you ask your boyfriend not to show anyone, there are never any guarantees he won’t.  Take things slow, the key is to be fun and be cute, with light sexual undertones.

The Husband or Fiancé

Go all out!  Need I say more?  Nothing is too racy when it comes to your hubby.  Nothing would brighten up his day more than seeing a sexy photo of you out of the blue in the middle of his workday.  Beware of business phones, because companies back up everything.  Never send any inappropriate messages through these outlets.

The Friend With Benefits

Some of us fall for him and some of us break his heart.  Sexting to a friend with benefits, much like a boyfriend, is high-risk business.  This carries slightly more of a risk if you’re the one doing the heartbreaking.  You never know to what lengths he’d go to retaliate.  If you’re going to get kinky, I recommend avoiding things in the photo that would be recognizable in deciphering who you are.  This includes, what very few remember: hair, jewelry, piercings, and, of course, your face.

Sexting the wrong person can certainly attract unsolicited attention by those around you.  This is especially dangerous if you’re in high school or college, where you can’t escape this attention.  This can cause embarrassment and definitely damage your reputation at work.

A Gossip Girl recap written by Cosmo prompted one especially wise message by the queen bee herself, Blair Waldorf, “Sexting is not sweet. It’s off limits before you’re in a relationship.”  Hint: If you don’t know his last name, it’s probably not the brightest idea to be sending him naked pictures of yourself.

–Imelda Vergara