If you watched Prince on Jimmy Kimmel Live a couple of weeks back, you may have noticed our most favored machiavellian has a new protege — Miss Andy Allo. When it comes to force feeding his muses down our throats, the “Purple One” just can’t help himself. The problem has always been, they tend to fall anywhere from Carmen Elektra to Sheila E in levels of genuine talent. So where does Allo fit in? That’s where it gets complicated, as the girl who’s been touring with Prince seems light years away from the natural (and more authentic) Coffee-House crowd pleaser, from Sacramento seen here. A lot about Andy has changed over the last couple of years and not in the Mariah Carey (got hella sexy after divorcing Tommy Mottola) kind of way.
The fact is you might find it hard to even recognize her (accept for that beautifully quaffed Fro), from her days on The Game or G4. Under the tutelage of Mr Nelson, Andy Allo somehow got Princified! From sneakers to thigh-high platform boots, minimalist make-up to smokey-eyed sultry gazes, even the casual acoustic guitar has become electrified. Unfortunately it’s not just her appearance, he’s transformed. Her demeanor, singing voice and performance style, has been completely altered too and my question simply is this — Why? She was already perfectly marketable (and enjoyable) two years ago. It’s one thing to mentor, but what’s occurring now is bordering on the Pygmalion Effect. Every aspect of her musical path, including the release of her new album Superconductor, seems controlled (and contrived) by Prince. Even with a lot being said (and argued) on the blogosphere, that Allo is merely a more malleable Esperanza Spalding for him to doppelgang into his own image. Yet not one media outlet (urban or otherwise), feels comfortable in discussing any of this. Guess what kids even a musician with a perfectly quaffed Fro, may still be, dare I say—manufactured. I really hope this isn’t a case of Princey Poo feeling that black female singer/musicians who possess afros are as easily interchangeable—regardless of strumming prowess—as his girlfriends and dates. That would be a tad cheeky! Furthermore, if he did, why not actually get a lady that can be seriously touted as a guitar virtuoso? Hey Prince how about Bibi McGill, she’s even got a Fro too!
Now don’t get me wrong I’m a long lover of Prince (a**less chaps and all), but having him marionette a 23 year old is becoming decidedly awkward to watch (TC: 2:03. sigh). I just don’t understand why he insists on forcing the funk upon her. One has to wonder does he genuinely care about her longevity, or is she merely another part of Mr Nelson’s Opus?
Let’s take a quick look at the Lemony Snicket series of events (that have been conveniently ignored or deleted), leading to the much hyped Andy Allo album release, set for Nov 20. For now.
• Why not take Janelle Monae or Esperanza Spalding on an international tour? Not as band members, but already established young female artists?
• When your protege falls short on national TV, don’t delete all the performances from Youtube, chances are we’ve already seen it.
• They constantly deny dating, which I both equally believe — and couldn’t care less about. I wish he would schtup her, ’cause that’s the only way you are gonna get the funk in there pal.
• Watching this performance makes me uncomfortable.
• Andy dancing on stage is a BAD idea. The poor girl got funked-over by Hannah Ford on Kimmel.
• Stop changing her Superconductor release dates. Only to cite Ledisi for accidentally leaking release info. The internet trail (and your own site’s history evidently) will prove otherwise, plus Prince’s obsessive fans will post about this faux pas.
• Finally if you heavily suggest that Prince is going to play at a listening party at HOB, don’t be surprise when this doesn’t happen (and fans have been waiting hours in the Chicago cold) that you someone will call the cops. Also when people question this on Facebook, don’t try and delete all the comments. I know the interweb is new for Prince, but someone needs to explain to him how screenshots work as proof in social media.
I wish Prince had mentored Andy Allo, the real one, not this odd creation that seems so forced into his funk.
What are your thoughts, kids?
Ta Ta for now!
– Trixie Label