Wednesday, May 1st, 2013

Editorial Adverts, Haute Press, Love + Sex, Men, Touché

Editorial Advert: How to Talk to Your Boyfriend About Sports, Beyond Mentioning All of the Players You Would Sleep With

The Silver Linings Playbook Editorial Advert: How to Talk to Your Boyfriend About Sports, Beyond Mentioning All of the Players You Would Sleep With

Sports aren’t my favorite thing. And if you’re reading this, they probably aren’t yours either. Hey, I get it. I don’t understand the appeal of watching a group of grown men or women in unflattering uniforms go out of their way to maim each other. Nevertheless, it’s likely a part of your partner’s life, and it’s about making compromises. Right?

Let’s just say it is.

Every now and then, you have to throw in the towel (first sports pun of my life…sort of) and set aside an afternoon for a sports session with the guys. Here are a few tips to help you through:

1. Start with a positive mindset. You’re not going to help anyone (least of all yourself) if you can’t even entertain the idea of being present. Don’t text, don’t roll your eyes, don’t ask “Is it over yet?” This is your boyfriend’s hobby, so don’t belittle it.

2. Do your due diligence. Is it a match or a game? Know the difference. Get comfortable with sports terminology. Are we dealing with runs, goals, touchdowns? Getting a head start is always a good idea — it’ll be infinitely better for everyone if you don’t ask how many innings there are during first pitch. A good way to get some context and stay involved is to follow your team on Twitter.

3. On that note, try not to chirp in with too many questions during the game. Have you ever gone to a movie with a friend only to have her constantly bug you about what’s going on? “Wait, why did that happen? Did that character die? I think that’s his father!” Picture that, but a thousand times worse, especially if there’s a beloved team involved. I’ve known friendships that have ended because a goal had to be caught on instant replay instead of being experienced in the moment.

4. Show some spirit! Find out which team your man supports, and embrace those colors! You don’t have to go too crazy with it – body paint is hard to put on, and even harder to get off. Try an eyeliner or lipstick that incorporates his team’s colors. If makeup isn’t your thing, a team accessory will also work!

5. When all else fails, make a game out of it. There are plenty of sport-specific drinking games that you can play. Ask your man, he’ll be more than happy to share. Try to stick with “Drink when this event happens” games as opposed to sports trivia, or you might not make it through the night.

Make the experience fun in a way that both of you can enjoy it, and you’ll open up a part of his life that you can be involved in. Best of all, he’ll associate his favorite hobby with you. At the end of the day, you’ll at least have earned yourself some serious brownie points for trying. Try it once, and let me know if you scored that night — sports pun intended.

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Saturday, March 16th, 2013

Haute Press, Love + Sex, Men, News, Touché

#Throwback Dealing With a Player? Bring Your A-Game

sanaa lathan #Throwback Dealing With a Player? Bring Your A Game

So you’re a lady who has eyes for a ladies’ man. You are certainly not the first, and you won’t be the last.  The game is rough, that’s why you need to learn how to play it. It’s been said to master the game, you must act like a guy. This is totally false. You are not a guy, you’re a girl – a woman – a femme fatale – a divine and amazing creature who is by nature (because Mother Nature is a girl, duh) much more emotionally-intelligent and intuitive than your male counterparts. You also have been blessed with this little thing called cleavage. You are a girl; you have a different (and very powerful) set of weapons, and you my dear, must utilize them. You’ve got a crush on a guy who loves to play games, but every game comes with a set of rules:

1. Avoid Jealousy and Hear-Say. When dealing with a Ladies’ Man, you are bound to run into this. Avoid it! If he is not taking the bait and you see him going after another girl, ignore it! If you hear rumors about him, ignore them! It’s hard to recover from drama especially if it happens too early on. Go about your night un-phased.

2. Be Cool With His Friends. Don’t confuse this with being “one of the guys”, because you are not one of the guys and once he sees you like that, it will be difficult to establish yourself as anything more.  However, if his friends approve of you as being “cool”, this will ease his decision as to whether or not you are a keeper.

3. Keep Your Options Open. You’re a girl remember? Girls always have options. That’s just the way of the world. So even if Mr. Ladies’ Man isn’t blowing up your phone, I’m sure that nice guy from work or the guy you met last week or that guy that’s had a crush on you for five years are all within reach, don’t rule them out!

4. Keep Him Guessing. Don’t make yourself too available. Don’t answer his texts right away or break plans to hang out with him. You are really cool, and really busy (even when you are sitting at home in your flannel PJ’s watching Sex & The City reruns with your dear friends Ben and Jerry).

5. Set Your Standards High From the Get-Go. Patti Stanger says, “The first date sets the precedent for the whole relationship.” Ladies’ Man is working off of his rules, so if the only time he’s hitting you up is past midnight when he wants to meet you at the bar after being out with his friends all night – decline. Unless he is taking you out to dinner or to a movie and treating you like a lady, it’s not a good move. It’s not a good move because that’s not good enough. Period.

6. Lust Isn’t Love Sweetheart. Let him get to know you, and don’t give him any nookie.  If you do, he has nothing else to work toward. You are a present in a big red bow. If you get unwrapped too early, you’ll just become a toy that he gets bored of playing with, and that effing sucks. Don’t put yourself in a position where your decision-making becomes clouded. You are worth the wait, and if he’s worth it, he will recognize this (and respect it).

7. Be Confident! Be Yourself! Never doubt yourself or try to be something you’re not. If you feel like you have to change who you are to please this guy, trust me, he’s not worth it.

8. Keep Your Guard Up. Don’t trust him too easily, but at the same time, still give him the benefit-of-the-doubt. His actions will always speak louder than his words. A lot of guys talk the talk, but many of them do not walk the walk. Don’t try to change him! Even though this seems like a fun challenge with a Ladies’ Man, it’s not. If you put yourself in a position to be walked all over, that is exactly what will happen. He will change if he WANTS to change. Remember most guys are going to tell you what they think you want to hear. Listen to him but be skeptical! He will show you how he really feels through his actions. If you start to see that it’s not going anywhere, be smart enough to walk away with your head held high.

9. Look Hot. It speaks for itself. Do your hair! Treat yourself to a mani/pedi.  Keep your lips glossed and your face fresh! Dress your best, but remember there’s a fine line between sexy and trashy. If you are showing cleavage, don’t show off your legs. If you are wearing a short skirt, wear a blazer. Dress for where you are going, but also dress in such a way that leaves some things up to the imagination.

10. Do Your Own Thing. This is HANDS DOWN the absolute most important rule. It’s great if you have things in common, but you do not have to share every single one of his interests (because that would just make you a “poser”, and that’s so middle school). You have plenty going on in your own life, and if you don’t, it’s time to change that. Fill up your free time with things you truly love doing, whether it be spending time with your friends, working out, traveling, or engrossing yourself in your job or schoolwork. Never become so attached to a guy (or the idea of a relationship) that you stop feeding your own life’s loves. Whether you are in it for the long haul or it doesn’t end up working out, remember you are too precious to ever lose yourself!

If you are forced to play the game, than by all means, play it. Use your tools and use them well.  However, the best guys are the ones that you don’t have to play games with. Sometimes the best relationships come from a situation where there was never a game at all. If you find someone you can have mutual honesty, respect, and trust with from the start…you’re golden!

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Friday, February 8th, 2013

Beauty, Fragrance, Love + Sex, Men, News

Fragrances You Can Share With Him For Valentine’s Day (And Every Other Day)

perfume1 Fragrances You Can Share With Him For Valentines Day (And Every Other Day)You love your guy’s scent, so much that you sleep in his shirt, lay on his pillow or get random whiffs of it throughout the day. Alas! We have rounded up some cures to the obsession of his lingering scent – four fragrances that are suitable for men and women. With these androgynous potions, you can share more than chocolates with him this Valentine’s Day.

perfume2 Fragrances You Can Share With Him For Valentines Day (And Every Other Day)

An Ode to New York Oud

The New York Oud by Bond No. 9 retains the androgynous nature of the Old World oud, but this new concoction is not traditional by any means. The timeless scent has been modernized and given an urban flair, creating a unique New York flair.

A sumptuous rose bouquet blends with musky teakwood and earthy vetiver to create a lingering urban-forest accord. It even boasts a top note of honey-like saffron – what Cleopatra threw into her bath to enhance lovemaking. This Oud launches in time for Valentine’s Day at Bond No. 9, so spray some on as you leave the store, and let it linger all night through to Feb. 15.

perfume3 Fragrances You Can Share With Him For Valentines Day (And Every Other Day)

Six Scents x Three Equals Amazing Sensory Overload

Six Scents Series Three evokes emotion that is a multi-sensory experience. Spraying on any of the Six Scents fragrances mimics the feeling you get when you put on a sexy dress – you just feel sexy. And that is exactly why it’s meant to be shared. For Series Three, six prominent designers from around the world collaborated with six perfumers to explore childhood memories and the influence of adolescence on identity. This collection for both men and women is a journey between the fading of innocence to the onset of rebellion, mischief and reality, with each scent being a completely different journey.

This collection isn’t only a gift for your significant other, a portion of proceeds goes to War Child International in support of reducing poverty, promoting education and standing up for children’s rights all over the world.

Take a look at their video on the inspiration behind the collection here.


perfume4 Fragrances You Can Share With Him For Valentines Day (And Every Other Day)

You Can Wear Kate Walsh’s Boyfriend

Kate Walsh’s new perfume, called Boyfriend, is meant for women, but he won’t know the difference. The marriage of the feminine and masculine scent, created by Private Practice star, was the result of a breakup where she missed the scent left behind. Realizing she didn’t need a boyfriend to enjoy “lingering scent”, Boyfriend was born. The blend of woods and florals is meant to give you the feeling of wearing your boyfriend’s shirt to sleep, except you have it wherever you go.

Boyfriend is available exclusively at Sephora.

perfume5 Fragrances You Can Share With Him For Valentines Day (And Every Other Day)

Tom Ford’s Exotic Dark Flower

Though Tom Ford’s Black Orchid is considered a women’s fragrance, we think it can go both ways. This dark flower is a far cry from a bunch of petunias. Black Orchid represents timeless luxury and worldly glamour reminiscent of classic fragrances.

This warm and spicy fragrance is a sensuous blend of black truffle and ylang with fresh bergamot and black currant as the top note. The heart is a mixture of the custom-made Tom Ford Black Orchid with dark, tempting florals and rich fruit accords deepened with intoxicating lotus wood. It is balanced with patchouli, incense and vetiver. Vanilla drops add a fluid creaminess to warm balsam and sandalwood. This fragrance whispers seduction.

Experience the Black Orchid at www.tomford.com.

*samples of some of these fragrances were provided for an adequate review


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Friday, February 1st, 2013

Haute Press, Love + Sex, Men, News, Opinion Poll

Chris Collins Exclusive: The Categories Men Put Women In, and How You Can Move Between

chris collins Chris Collins Exclusive: The Categories Men Put Women In, and How You Can Move Between

There is a notion that when a man meets a woman, he can immediately put her in a category where he sees that woman playing a role in is life. And I’m here to tell you it’s true….to a certain extent. Now this may seem a bit harsh, but as a man I don’t think we purposely do this. Wait, let me take that back, we completely know that we’re doing when we do this. I just think this is the only way men can make sense out of their relationships with the very intricate and complex, yet magnificent and precious treasure that a woman is. Now that I’ve buttered you up, here’s how it goes.

There are four main categories that men place women in upon meeting them. There is the Girlfriend, the Sex Partner, the Best Friend, and last but not least the once in lifetime, love at first site, myth I’ve only read about in books or seen in movies but I think is completely probable…..the Wife. Now I’m sure there are thousands of sub-categories within the four I’ve mentioned, but to keep this as simple as possible we’ll just stick with these. Oh and there’s another point I need to make.  I’m assuming that the men I’m speaking about are single. If a man is married or in a relationship, well let’s just say that that’s a whole other fish to fry. This as you know can get extremely complicated.

Men are very animalistic in nature. Think of them as animals in the wild. If they see something that attracts them, they either want to kill it and eat it, or love it. Let’s just call this natural selection. Now unless this guy is a cannibal or a nut case, he will in most cases want to love it.  This brings me to my first category, the Sex Partner. Man and woman were created for each other for a sole purpose, and that is to mate and reproduce. And trust me when a man sees a woman from across the room or at a bar and says to himself, wow she’s hot, his headmost instinct is to grab her, rip her clothes off and mate. It could be her beauty, her smile, her style, etc. But whatever it is, that initial allure has sex written all over it. So even before you meet, before you say single word to each other, you have already been categorized as a sex partner.

Now at some point he will muster up the courage to come and talk to you about his plan to have sex with you until you both pass out from exhaustion. And at this point, here is where the real game begins. Within moments he will know if you will stay in that category of you being his sex partner for a little while. Or will there be something that happens during your interaction that suddenly moves you into another? That depends. It will be the difference between him saying, “So do you want to come to my place for a drink tonight” or, “can I have your number so I can take you to lunch tomorrow”. Her are the different scenarios that can ensue.

So now you meet, and he sees that you are just like him, maybe too much like him and maybe he wasn’t as into you as much as he thought he would be. He realizes you both love sports, cats, watching documentaries about veganism or whatever. You laugh and joke all night wondering how the time passed. And all of a sudden he forgets about how bad he wanted to jump your bones, and realizes how cool you are. All he wants to do is hang out with you, grab a beer or do something together that you both have in common. You my dear have now been put in the category of a Best Friend. But hold on, before we go any further. I have a theory about men and women being “best friends”. If one or both of the participants in this friendship is attractive, this friendship will never work. Especially since you two met initially through that attraction. It will always end up one day with one of you crying and confessing how you always loved the other person for years and couldn’t hold it in anymore. Or after a fun night of drinking a laugh turns into a kiss and you both wake up the next morning in bed wondering what the hell just happened. In that case either the friendship ends or you slip effortlessly into the category of either the sex partner, the girlfriend and maybe even one day his wife!! That’ll be a funny story for a wedding speech.

Ok, back the point. Let’s rewind a bit and talk about that initial interaction again. So now when you meet, you blow him away with your wit and your charm. He realizes you are smart and funny with good values, great career, etc. Every box on his continuously changing punch list is checked. This makes you even more beautiful than he thought. He sees, that at least from your initial meeting that you are the girl that he’s been waiting to meet in is unsuccessful quest for companionship. You are now in the category of Girl Friend.  Your goin home to momma!!

And last but not least, the category of Wife. As legend has it, there are some encounters that are Godly and upon meeting a woman you know in that second that she is your wife. I’ve never experienced this yet, but I’m assuming that this is what it would feel like. “When I meet you everything in the room disappears. There is a glow around you, and my heart feels like it’s going to beat out of my chest. Every word you say, sounds like a symphony of Mozart. I look into your eyes and I see your soul. I feel you. You ask, “why are you staring at me like that”, and I’m thinking because all I can do is imagine you playing with our children in our yard. I’m already checking the ring of  your first name with my last. I completely lose time. I’ve known you all my life. You are my Wife”. Wow, what an image!

One very important thing to keep in mind, is that it is very easy to slip in and out and back and forth between these categories. What you imagined in the beginning may not be. Life is funny in the way things turn out sometime. The woman you believed to be your wife may end up being the girlfriend you let get away. Or the sex partner you imagined became the best friend because the your sexual connection was terrible. But trust me, they do exist. You just never know which one you will start or where you will ultimately end up.

Chris Collins a model for Ralph Lauren for 16 years is not your average model. Beyond his looks, and his charm, he’s smart. With degrees in Biology and psychology, planning to be a Doctor later in life, he will soon be using his intelligence and influence on his own platform, as a journalist.  This piece is a sampling of his work and his creation of the long awaited….Chris Collins Report!

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Friday, January 25th, 2013

Love + Sex, Men, News, Opinion Poll, Touché

Opinion Poll: Debunking Myths, Let’s stop Shaming Sluts & Educate them!

Slut Shaming Opinion Poll: Debunking Myths, Let’s stop Shaming Sluts & Educate them!

First and foremost, what makes someone a “Prostitute”? Conjuring up a definition here: If you are doing anything sexually on command in exchange for anything else, it’s very much along the lines of what street walkers do. To put sex in the same category with bartering is to take away its intent and purpose. So, What is a “whore”? In my opinion, a woman that will degrade herself sexually in exchange for something she wants. Whoring is more of a “mentality”, if you have the “flaunt your stuff” to get more “stuff” mentality, if falls in line with the same idea of fucking to win.

Now that we’ve laid that on the line, what’s wrong with “Slut Shaming”? Shaming women who enjoy sex or have lots of it is not only wrong, but dumb. Sex is a personal choice…if a woman is exercising her choice to sleep with someone, that’s quite liberating either way. We hope that she maintains her decision making in the process and chooses as she pleases. Not only is “Slut Shaming” wrong, but it’s more likely to desensitize the world to rape victims, victims of sex trafficking and women that are being degraded.

The problem with Prostitutes vs Sluts:

We all have a choice, what is called agency or a decision to make. A woman that accepts cash in exchange for using her body is either misguided or desperate. There’s this underlying desensitation going on in the media that “everyone is a whore”, most women know, this is not the case. Misogynistic men and idiotic women will lead women to believe that the only way to get “what they want” is to use “what they have”…but what we possess is not between our legs but the POWER to choose who we sleep with based on other reasons residing in our heart.

The problem with prostitutes is: Many of them have convinced themselves that this is what everyone is doing. Let’s debunk this myth and move on to why they deserve better. Every day is a choice and every decision is the next progressive, the problem with not seeing these women as “lost” or “misguided/desperate” is: We see them as predators rather than women that should be educated on how to value themselves.

It all starts with self-worth and efficacy, and when a woman knows her POWER lies between her ears and not between her legs, she conducts herself differently.

Modern day “sluts” are: Women who sleep with a lot of men willfully. Now, let’s not confuse the two. A “Slut” is similar by not valuing herself, and equating sex with “POWER” but the problem is: Oftentimes women that are deemed SLUTS by men aren’t necessarily or nearly as bad as the proclaiming men would covey. A woman’s choice to sleep with someone is her own. When men refer to women as “SLUTS” many times it’s for the sake of deteriorating the woman’s self-esteem and leading her to believe that her only value lies between her legs and that she is forced to use ‘what she has’ to please ‘the world’.

Please leave your thoughts on the comments, would love to hear more!

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