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Monday, June 1st, 2015

Fun, Love, POSHGLAM







SheKnows.com Feature: 10 Signs You Are the Crazy-Ex

ex big bang

You might be justifying all of that Facebook stalking, the late-night texts, the lengthy emails and anonymous phone calls to his new girlfriend (who you’re pretty sure he met while you were still dating), but have you gone too far? Have your friends been subtly hinting that you might be heading into crazy territory?

We’re sharing 10 signs you might be “That Crazy Ex-Bitch” from SheKnows.com

1)  You think about him all the time

When you’re thinking about your ex to the extent that these thoughts are interfering with your day-to-day life, he’s become your focus, notes April Masini, author and relationship expert at AskApril.com. He shouldn’t be your focus — you should be your focus. “It’s understandable that breaking up requires a transition period, but after a few months, these thoughts should taper off, and you should focus more on what’s in front of you that’s possible, and not on what’s behind you,” she advises.

2) You still have him on Facebook, Twitter, etc.

Following a breakup, it’s a good idea to cut social media ties with an ex. If you haven’t, you’re likely still too attached. “You’re going to be tortured by his presence on your social media, especially when he starts dating,” says Masini. “You won’t be able to enjoy your social media friends and contacts when you’re always clicking on his information.”

3) You stalk him regularly on social media

As Masini tells us, keeping your ex on Facebook or similar can easily lead to stalking. The information is readily available and oh-so-tempting to pore over again and again. But, she warns that you won’t get the whole story behind the photos or the tweets, just enough to lure you in and get you addicted: “Stalking means you’ve given up your power and you’re investing it in a failed relationship.”

True story: For about six months after my last breakup, the first thing I did every morning, even before coffee, was check my ex’s Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. Finally my best friend came over and deleted him from all platforms to save my sanity. I love her for it. Rochelle, 28

4) You ask his friends about him

Continuously asking his friends or your mutual friends for information about your ex is a mistake and a big step into crazy ex territory. “Before you know it, you’re going to get a reputation, and you’ll start noticing your invitations are dissipating,” says Masini. “If you can’t stop asking or wondering, make new friends who don’t know him,” she advises.

True story: I convinced myself it was better to ask about my ex than not talk about him because I thought it made me seem like I was more over it. But really I just ended up sounding like a broken record and if I’m honest, a bit of a stalker. Anonymous

5) You frequent places you might see him

Do yourself (and your dignity) a favor and stay away from places you know he’ll be. “As soon as he realizes you’re following him, or worse, showing up at his haunts before he even gets there, he’s going to eventually find new places to hang out and you’ll be out of the loop,” warns Masini. She suggests using the breakup as an opportunity to find a better gym, a better coffee shop and a better dog park.

True story: I was so intent on seeing my ex I joined his gym. Big mistake. It was so awkward every time I saw him I could never concentrate on my workouts and I quit a month later.Deanna, 25

6) You still have all the things he gave you

Still have all his stuff? It’s time to purge. “Keeping a shrine to your ex by maintaining a box of his stuff long after you’ve broken up with him is going to be weird at best, and obsessive at worst,” Masini says. It also keeps you anchored in the past. She recommends getting his stuff together and mailing it back to him, his mom or donating it to Goodwill.

7) You text and email him

Women who chase men lose out, Masini says. And guess what? Texting, emailing and calling him count as chasing him — especially when you’re initiating the chase, she explains: “I’ve heard from loads of women who justify doing this, but in the end, it catches up to them. If he’s your ex, that means he’s going to sleep with you if you make it that easy, but he’s also going to be looking for relationships and sex elsewhere, too.”

8) You’re devising plans to get back together

People do reunite, but the circumstances need to be right and both people need to be ready. But, says Masini, if he’s changed the locks, is dating someone else, and you saw them perusing rings at the mall, chances are, no matter how elaborate a plan you’ve hatched, he’s moved on: “It takes two people to get together, and one to break up.”

9) You want to sabotage his new relationship

The problem with sabotage, as tempting as it is when you find out he’s dating someone else, is that you may end up driving him further away from you and more quickly into the arms of this new person. “You’ll get a short-term boost and a long-term let down. The best revenge is living well, and that’s a fact,” says Masini. “If you really want to make him second guess himself, go have a great life and be gracious and polite.”

True story: My friends and I spent so many hours and consumed many bottles of wine, hatching schemes of sabotage to scare off my ex’s new girlfriend. We never put any into action, but I’m still embarrassed I was so intent on breaking them up. Laurel, 32

10) Your friends are sick of hearing about him

You might be hung up on your ex, but eventually your friends aren’t going to want to hear about it. “You’ll know that your friends are sick of hearing about your ex because they’ll stop calling you, the calls they do make will be shorter, and you’ll be invited out less and less,” says Masini. “You’ll start hearing about fun times you weren’t included in because they didn’t want to hear tales of woe.”

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Tuesday, April 21st, 2015

Love, POSHGLAM







Cribsheet for Online Dating @PlentyOfFish

online dating couple color
So, you want to try online dating eh (POF.com)? We should preface this article buy saying that our tips probably aren’t for you if you’re looking for a quickie shag with a relative stranger. It may be a good time, but we’ll keep our dirty nocturnal secrets to ourselves; that’s for another time and another post our friends!

For most people, finding love online is kind of like shopping at ASOS: you pretty much put every size and style in your basket and hope for the best. You may bag the most magnificent jumpsuit known to mankind which makes your ass looks amazing, or be stuck with a bunch of s**t you just don’t need in your closet (i.e. your life). Online dating has compressed the world of men into a tiny pill that can be hard to swallow (did someone say swallow?). Having dabbled in some online dating ourselves, we are here to dispense some (hopefully) helpful insight to finding true love (or at the very least, one good date) online. Behold! The WAGs guide to online dating:

Be yourself:

We don’t mean this in the generic way your grandma used to tell you when she caught you stuffing your bra age ten. We do mean be your most authentic self: whether this means not photoshopping your profile pictures to oblivion (Beyoncé’s thigh gap?), writing your profile according to what you think people want (those two packs of cigarettes in your bag doesn’t make you a light smoker) or showing up on your first date with a fabricated alter ego you think will be super awesome (when did your job as a primary school teacher become a fashion model strutting the cat walks of Milan!?). Be you! You can only live life as ‘pretend you’ for so long before the cracks will start to appear. Plus, wouldn’t it be nice (and so much easier) to be honest with a potential partner from day 1? No one likes a liar, fool!

It’s a numbers game:

Now, this may sound cynical – but the WAGs aren’t here coddle you like Julie Andrews from the Sound of Music. Now there are some lucky few out there who happen to find Mr. Right on their first date – if only the rest of us could be that lucky! Fact of the the matter is, you may think you’re a real catch and that your s**t don’t stink, but nothing good will ever happen from putting all your eggs in one basket from Date #1. Don’t be discouraged: it may take 4, 11 or 20 dates to find someone you really click with and that’s perfectly normal. Have a little faith, take that pre-date vodka shot, get that little black dress on and get your ass out there.

Don’t be nitpick:

Jason is perfect – gorgeous eyes, gorgeous bod and a killer profile. But alas…he’s a dog man and you’re considering adopting your third cat. Before you even think about tossing this guy into your e-trash, remember that you too are not perfect and might also not be every single thing someone is dreaming of. Have an open mind and remember that, like in real life, relationships are a give and take and rely on compromise. He may surprise you and be the ying to your yang or the milk to your Coco Puffs or….no more, you get the drift.

One last thing:

If, after giving it a good go, you’re just not feeling one with this whole online dating thing, don’t be afraid to admit it to yourself. It won’t be everyone’s cup of tea, and it takes courage to admit that too. Some people just prefer meeting their one and only the good ol’ fashioned way: intoxicated, sweaty and doing the robot at the office party.
May the gods of the world wide web be with you!

Contributed by the WAGs, Sophie and Aleks – Singaporean and American, two good friends with a penchant for making fools of themselves in public. Together they navigate living abroad, regularly hand out unsolicited advice on lifestyle, beauty and fashion and what it truly means to be a fabulous WAG. Check out their website, Like them on Facebook, follow them on Instagram and Twitter and watch them on YouTube

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Thursday, April 2nd, 2015

Fun, Love, POSHGLAM







Chris Collins Exclusive: The Categories Men Put Women In, and How You Can Move Between

Model Chris Collins

There is a notion that when a man meets a woman, he can immediately put her in a category where he sees that woman playing a role in is life. And I’m here to tell you it’s true….to a certain extent. Now this may seem a bit harsh, but as a man I don’t think we purposely do this. Wait, let me take that back, we completely know that we’re doing when we do this. I just think this is the only way men can make sense out of their relationships with the very intricate and complex, yet magnificent and precious treasure that a woman is. Now that I’ve buttered you up, here’s how it goes.

There are four main categories that men place women in upon meeting them. There is the Girlfriend, the Sex Partner, the Best Friend, and last but not least the once in lifetime, love at first site, myth I’ve only read about in books or seen in movies but I think is completely probable…..the Wife. Now I’m sure there are thousands of sub-categories within the four I’ve mentioned, but to keep this as simple as possible we’ll just stick with these. Oh and there’s another point I need to make.  I’m assuming that the men I’m speaking about are single. If a man is married or in a relationship, well let’s just say that that’s a whole other fish to fry. This as you know can get extremely complicated.

Men are very animalistic in nature. Think of them as animals in the wild. If they see something that attracts them, they either want to kill it and eat it, or love it. Let’s just call this natural selection. Now unless this guy is a cannibal or a nut case, he will in most cases want to love it.  This brings me to my first category, the Sex Partner. Man and woman were created for each other for a sole purpose, and that is to mate and reproduce. And trust me when a man sees a woman from across the room or at a bar and says to himself, wow she’s hot, his headmost instinct is to grab her, rip her clothes off and mate. It could be her beauty, her smile, her style, etc. But whatever it is, that initial allure has sex written all over it. So even before you meet, before you say single word to each other, you have already been categorized as a sex partner.

Now at some point he will muster up the courage to come and talk to you about his plan to have sex with you until you both pass out from exhaustion. And at this point, here is where the real game begins. Within moments he will know if you will stay in that category of you being his sex partner for a little while. Or will there be something that happens during your interaction that suddenly moves you into another? That depends. It will be the difference between him saying, “So do you want to come to my place for a drink tonight” or, “can I have your number so I can take you to lunch tomorrow”. Her are the different scenarios that can ensue.

So now you meet, and he sees that you are just like him, maybe too much like him and maybe he wasn’t as into you as much as he thought he would be. He realizes you both love sports, cats, watching documentaries about veganism or whatever. You laugh and joke all night wondering how the time passed. And all of a sudden he forgets about how bad he wanted to jump your bones, and realizes how cool you are. All he wants to do is hang out with you, grab a beer or do something together that you both have in common. You my dear have now been put in the category of a Best Friend. But hold on, before we go any further. I have a theory about men and women being “best friends”. If one or both of the participants in this friendship is attractive, this friendship will never work. Especially since you two met initially through that attraction. It will always end up one day with one of you crying and confessing how you always loved the other person for years and couldn’t hold it in anymore. Or after a fun night of drinking a laugh turns into a kiss and you both wake up the next morning in bed wondering what the hell just happened. In that case either the friendship ends or you slip effortlessly into the category of either the sex partner, the girlfriend and maybe even one day his wife!! That’ll be a funny story for a wedding speech.

Ok, back the point. Let’s rewind a bit and talk about that initial interaction again. So now when you meet, you blow him away with your wit and your charm. He realizes you are smart and funny with good values, great career, etc. Every box on his continuously changing punch list is checked. This makes you even more beautiful than he thought. He sees, that at least from your initial meeting that you are the girl that he’s been waiting to meet in is unsuccessful quest for companionship. You are now in the category of Girl Friend.  Your goin home to momma!!

And last but not least, the category of Wife. As legend has it, there are some encounters that are Godly and upon meeting a woman you know in that second that she is your wife. I’ve never experienced this yet, but I’m assuming that this is what it would feel like. “When I meet you everything in the room disappears. There is a glow around you, and my heart feels like it’s going to beat out of my chest. Every word you say, sounds like a symphony of Mozart. I look into your eyes and I see your soul. I feel you. You ask, “why are you staring at me like that”, and I’m thinking because all I can do is imagine you playing with our children in our yard. I’m already checking the ring of  your first name with my last. I completely lose time. I’ve known you all my life. You are my Wife”. Wow, what an image!

One very important thing to keep in mind, is that it is very easy to slip in and out and back and forth between these categories. What you imagined in the beginning may not be. Life is funny in the way things turn out sometime. The woman you believed to be your wife may end up being the girlfriend you let get away. Or the sex partner you imagined became the best friend because the your sexual connection was terrible. But trust me, they do exist. You just never know which one you will start or where you will ultimately end up.

Chris Collins a model for Ralph Lauren for 16 years is not your average model. Beyond his looks, and his charm, he’s smart. With degrees in Biology and psychology, planning to be a Doctor later in life, he will soon be using his intelligence and influence on his own platform, as a journalist.  This piece is a sampling of his work and his creation of the long awaited….Chris Collins Report!

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Wednesday, January 7th, 2015

Fun, Love, POSHGLAM







First Date No-no’s: Check Please or Back to Mine Please?

First Date

Ahhh, first dates. Sweaty arm pits, too many cocktails and the promise of eternal love, marriage and a truck load of babies. Sound familiar? First dates can be exhilarating and let’s face it, who doesn’t like buying new heels you can’t afford and walking into a restaurant to your own personal theme song playing in your head…Baby Got Back? I think so!

But let’s not forget, for all those first date butterflies, you also have an equal chance of meeting American Psycho or Glenn the Medieval Re-enactment Society chairman who lives with his mother. Before you pull the plug and signal your best friend to make that “emergency call” so you can make a hasty beeline for the exit, read the WAGs’ (hopefully helpful) guidelines for knowing whether your date is Mr. I’ll-see-you-again or Mr. One-date-was-enough-FOREVER.

1) The first fifteen minutes were going great. That is, until Cindy – your very blonde and very buxom waitress – brings over the water for the table. Suddenly your date’s eyes are no longer on your baby blues but are glued to Cindy’s damn jugs. And no, he’s not parched from running a marathon. The jury is split on this one; whilst we do think men tend to be visual creatures, the first date is pretty early to be checking out other talent. Though it could be a harmless habit (maybe he’s a nervous character or maybe he’s wanted by the cops!?), it can also be a sign of possible obstacles to come. If it becomes clear that he just can’t help but look at anything that’s breathing, has breasts and wearing a short skirt – it’s time to grab yourself a cab. Alone.

2) Dan is charming, well dressed and devilishly handsome…and he also happened to dissect and debate every last cent on your dinner bill when it finally comes. Was that extra scoop of ice cream his or yours? Did they really charge for water? And what do they mean the breadsticks are included in the service charge!? Oh Dan – you were doing so well. We’re clear on this one: no one likes a cheap skate on the first date – or going forward. Whilst we don’t consider ourselves gold-diggers, a calculating and stingy attitude can be a real turn off….and we doubt it will get any better by date No. 2.

3) When he checked his phone the first time, you didn’t take notice. The second, you asked if everything was okay at home. By the tenth, you were convinced he would rather be anywhere else but here. Frankly, if he can’t make you a priority on the first date, he’s probably never going to get the Lifelong Partnership Award. Unless his house is on fire, he has a critically ill aunt or Scruffy-the-dog is suicidal when left alone for more than an hour, you may not want to arrange that second date unless you’re prepared for another three-way with him and his Blackberry.

4) It’s an hour into your date and you know all about his life story, his family’s history of Alpha-1 Antitrypsin Deficiency (WHAT!?) and his Uncle Herbert’s penchant for paisley ties and well done steak. Oddly enough, you haven’t got past your name and the fact you work in HR. Hmmm – he might just be a tiny bit self-involved. Whilst confidence is key and a good talker is entertaining, there should be room for breathing and acknowledging the fact that this is a date and not a one way monologue. Ditch now or forever hold your peace.

5) Unless this guy is Michael Fassbender from Jane Eyre (in which case, tie us up and call us Jane!), sexual deviants are a big no-no. I’m eating lasagna for f**ks sake; I don’t want to hear how you want to bend me over a table the second you get a chance. This reminds us of a date one of us had…and no, it didn’t end well. While some sexual tension à la Christian Grey is very exciting, it sounds to us like this could fizzle very quickly if we can’t make it five seconds into the date without sexual innuendo.

So there you go, the WAGs guide to that all important first date. Hopefully our insight has been somewhat helpful in navigating this sometimes scary territory. Most importantly, let loose, be yourself and trust your instincts. May the odds forever be in your favour!

Contributed by the WAGs, Sophie and Aleks – Singaporean and American, two good friends with a penchant for making fools of themselves in public. Together they navigate living abroad, regularly hand out unsolicited advice on lifestyle, beauty and fashion and what it truly means to be a fabulous WAG. Check out their website, Like them on Facebook, follow them on Instagram and Twitter and watch them on YouTube…

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Thursday, November 27th, 2014

Fun, Love, Miami, POSHGLAM







Fun after the Sun: Winter Dating Ideas — Taken From A Man

Harry Met SallyThe weather outside is frightful, but your lady is so delightful. You want to show her a good time in the cold – where to go, where to go, where to go?

As the winter gods commence their takeover faster than Ariana Grande’s climb up the pop charts, showing that special lady a good time while battling the elements, can be a challenge. However, freezing temperatures should not freeze the dating fun – Netflix and hot coco will not survive the entire “cuffing season.”

The cold weather presents the opportunity for fun and creative evenings with the boo. Here are a few winter dating ideas to keep the fun alive.

Coffee and Carol Writing

Did you know that Bing Crosby’s “White Christmas” is the best-selling single of all time? In fact, due to their yearly rotation, holiday songs are generally big business. Thus, why don’t you and her grab a pen and notepad and write a Christmas Carol at a coffee shop together! Perhaps you two and Mr. Crosby will never compare royalty checks, but the memory of writing a song together will forever ring silver bells of harmony.

Build-a-Boo Workshop

Here is how it works: (1) start with a plain teddy bear, reindeer, elf, or other stuffed animal, (2) decorate it with clothes and accessories, and (3) exchange little boos with one another. You may have too much pride to nestle with a stuffed animal, but she will appreciate a fluffy friend to hold at night when you are away.

Ugly Sweater Photo Shoot

Remember those ugly Christmas sweaters your mother took pictures of you in to send to grandma? Well, now is your chance to redeem yourself, except this time, you will have a beautiful lady with you to counteract the tacky sweater. However, no cutting corners! Cell phone pictures are not allowed. Instead, set up an actual photography appointment or find a now-historic photo booth to take pictures in.

His & Hers Ornaments

Anyone can buy candy canes and put a star atop a tree. However, it takes real ingenuity to make an ornament, even just one. Embrace the challenge together. Head to your local arts and crafts store and make your own angels, stars, or stocking to fill with candy. Santa will be proud.

Pinterest Night In

Nights in are enjoyably inevitable. However, break the monotony with a simple collaborative cuisine challenge. Find something to make together a la Pinterest, trek to the grocery store, and see just how well you two follow directions in creating a five star meal.

Bowling . . . With a Little Winter Wager

Bowling is old faithful. You actually have to try to mess this one up! However, add a friendly wager to add some flavor. The first person to throw three consecutive strikes or spares gets treated to a movie of their choice. Perhaps sir must outscore madam by 50 pins for a new scarf, or vice versa. The higher the stakes, the higher the fun.

The Light Stroll

Most cities display vivid, decorative winter lights somewhere. Find them and take a stroll in the cold, holding hands while you two enjoy the warmth of the luminescence. Who says romanticism doesn’t exist?

Hot Yoga

When it’s cold outside, what better way to stay warm and fit than hot yoga? Winter is the perfect time to warrior pose you all’s way to health and energy while the elements do their best to keep you two indoors indulging on Thanksgiving leftovers.

Sex[es] Therapy

You would think that after co-existing on Earth for millions of years that men and women would understand one another. Wrong! Make it a fun night with food, drinks, and a group of friends. Separately place guys and gals on opposing sides, pick a moderator, and debate gender-specific topics of you all’s choice on hand-written cards. For example, “Describe the ideal date froma man’s/woman’s perspective”; “What is the big deal about guys and Madden”; “How do men really feel about hair and makeup”; “Discuss the best way to approach women.”

Game Night

Before the days of PlayStation and apps were cardboard platforms and little plastic pieces. Take a journey back in time and roll the dice with a game of monopoly, or perhaps stretch your imagine with taboo. You would be surprised how much fun there is to be had when you trade in Words With Friends for an old-fashioned Scrabble match. Double the fun and make it a double date.

Written by C. Charles Carson – C. Charles Carson is a third year law student at the University of Miami School of law. He also completed his Master’s in Multimedia Writing and Production in 2013. He recently contributed “Why Men Cheat” and aspires to be a US Congressman and media personality.

 

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