FCUK Sub Silky Tie Blouse Bares It’s Royal Highness, Kate Middleton’s Famous Portrait

Kate Middleton French Connection

We all remember Her Royal Highness the Duchess of Cambridge’s very gracious portrait. Can we say grace over glamour, guts over glory? It was… different, to say the least. The very least. Although we hated the portrait, there was one aspect of it that was recently brought to our attention by a very bright British PR birdie. For her immaculate portrait, Kate wore a French Connection Sub Silky Tie Blouse in navy. For 118 royal bucks, you can own the very blouse that the British beauty grinned and beared with class. A fairly reasonable way to look like a princess and to sit still in horror while doing so.

My only question is, why hasn’t the dude who painted her portrait been thrown in the chokey yet? I know he supposedly won some kind of a painting award a few years back but come on, people, there had to be better candidates out there when it came to this. Or maybe he just has a weird old person fetish and wanted to make Kate look older because ideally, that’s how he’d be the most attracted to her.

I think this is definitely a plausible hypothesis that needs to be further investigated. Had he featured Kate’s French Connection blouse in the portrait, I might have cut him some slack because that would obviously mean that he has at least a little taste when it comes to clothes. But he has no taste and he didn’t include the blouse in the portrait. So no slack for him. He can go FCUK himself!

On the other hand, Kate’s beautiful and he totally messed up her face, so who’s to say he wouldn’t have taken this blouse and made it look like trash, no, trash? If it had been of her ensemble as well, however, he probably would’ve made this blouse look dowdy, moth-eaten and faded. In other words, he would’ve made it look old. Get it? See what I did there? I demand a repainting of our favorite princess, straight-away, but if he's the one considering the redo, we'll just have to wait on the bloody bastard to get some painting lessons, Ross?


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